Some wisdom comes only with hindsight.
Thinking back on how good it would have been to gain the learning without having to live through the lesson, and knowing it’s never too late to pass on wisdom to others, here are 19 truths that I wish my younger self had known.
1. Your oldest fears are the worst. Our worst fears are grounded in our past. Fear can cripple our experiences and stall success, and the worst part is that we inflict it on ourselves. Work through your old fears so you can let them go and be free.
2. Being too sure of yourself means you are a fool. Confidence is great, but there’s such a thing as too much. It’s a fine line from overconfidence to entitlement–thinking that you’re so smart and talented that you deserve to win without even really trying.
3. Confusion isn’t always bad. At the intersection of confusion and simplicity lies truth. When we confuse ourselves, it just means we’re opening the door to understanding and achievement. It’s a true sign of honest progress.
4. A sincere effort is all you need. When things seem impossible, remember that sincere, persistent effort is often the difference between failure and success.
5. A positive attitude makes all the difference in the world. A strong positive attitude creates success. Life is 10 percent how you make it and 90 percent how you take it.
6. Drama often obscures the real issues. Drama doesn’t just walk into your life–either you created it, invited it, or associate with it. Look at any drama in your life and see how to deal with it best to get it out of your way. Maturity starts when drama ends.
7. Every achievement requires a sacrifice. And great achievements are usually born of great sacrifices. if you aren’t willing to make sacrifices for what you want, what you want will be the sacrifice. A noble purpose inspires sacrifice, stimulates innovation, and encourages perseverance.
8. Fear is the greatest enemy. Simply put: Don’t let fear rule your life. Being in charge and taking control will motivate you like nothing else.
9. Keep going no matter what. Three things you need are the fortitude to start, the tenacity to stick with it, and the guts to keep going. Sometimes you have to suffer through the worst to learn how to make it through to the best.
10. Push yourself to the limit as often as possible. If you want something you’ve never had, you have to to do something you have never done. Strength doesn’t come from doing what you know you can do but from pushing yourself past your limits.
11. Repetition is the best way to learn. No one is born with skill; they’re developed through exercise and repetition. Learning happens with a blend of learning and reflection that’s both painstaking and rewarding, and the willingness to learn will take you far.
12. Self-contempt can seriously hold you back. Don’t allow negative and judgmental thoughts to kill the self-esteem you need. The image that others see is the reflection of what you see in yourself.
13. Solitude is enlightening. The quieter you can become, the more you will hear.
14. Don’t be taken in by big talk. Those who talk the most often think the least. Plato said that wise men speak because they have something to say, but fools speak because they have to say something.
15. Wishing things away is not effective. Instead of trying to wish things away, work to make things happen. Dealing with difficult issues can be scary, but not dealing with them is even scarier. As Carl Jung said, “What you resist persists.”
16. You can’t expect people to be something they are not. One of the hardest things to learn is that you can’t change people. Your job is not to change others but to work on yourself, to learn new ways to think so you can master new ways to be.
17. Remember where you stop and where the world begins. How can you make a mark? What wat void can you fill, what gap can you permeate? Once you know the answer, do everything you can to achieve it. Allow your passions to become your purpose.
18. You owe the world, not the other way around. Life’s not about what you can get but what you can give. It’s about who you have lifted, whose life you’ve made better, who you’ve supported and encouraged.
19. Never stop doing your best just because you’re not getting credit. Whether you’re honored, recognized or appreciated, or not, keep doing your best. The rewards will come from knowing what you’ve contributed.
N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
THE LEADERSHIP GAP
What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.