We all have our leadership blind spots, and sometimes even the most intelligent leaders say things that are—well, just stupid. And then they’re surprised when, predictably, they get the opposite effect of what they want.
Here are the 12 stupidest things you can say to your team, but they must be stopped immediately.
“Do it my way.” If you hire a group of talented individuals to use their skills and expertise to do a job, then tell them to do it exactly the way you would do it, you’re bound to alienate and disempower them.
“That will never happen.” Using the word never closes a door, and it makes you sound unprofessional and limited. Nothing is impossible—there are always opportunities and options.
“Do you know what I mean?” It’s always important to make sure you’re connecting with people and that everyone’s on the same page, but you need to find a way to do so that isn’t condescending and annoying.
“It’s none of your business.” Anything that pertains to the project or the team is everyone’s business.
“That was my idea.” If you’re caught up who gets credit, you’re not concentrating on what’s important. As a team, you do things together to accomplish great things. Focusing on individuals—especially yourself—is inappropriate on a team project where the goal is a collective accomplishment and result.
“You’re doing it wrong.” There are many ways to tell people they seem to be moving off track. It’s important to remember that people do things in different ways, so they may just be taking a different approach. If you think someone is in error, enter into a dialogue instead of making pronouncements.
“Before you say that, let me tell you . . . ” Why would you want to shut people down or tell them not to speak? Communication is key to great teamwork, and you want to encourage people to express themselves. Listen before you speak.
“I already knew that.” Even if it’s true, listen again. Maybe this time you’ll learn something new.
“Because I said so.” This phrase, the hallmark of halfhearted parenting, will make people roll their eyes and lose all respect for your leadership.
“You must have misunderstood.” Sometimes people do misunderstand, but it’s unprofessional and disrespectful to assume that a miscommunication was entirely the other person’s fault. You don’t want to make people feel they’re not smart enough to understand what you want from them.
“What’s in it for me?” This phrase shouldn’t even be in a leader’s vocabulary. What’s in it for us? is more like it. A team is a collective, and what happens to one happens to all.
“I’m the boss.” They know you’re the boss. And you wouldn’t have to remind them if you acted like their boss—by letting them do their job, empowering them, supporting them, and helping them develop.
Lead from within: We have all said stupid things without being aware of them. When you’re in a leadership position, it’s especially important to think before you speak.
#1 N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
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Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.