Our thoughts are more powerful than we realize, governing our expectations, our interactions, and ultimately our ability to be successful.
It’s easy for delusions and lies to take root and grow, and left unchecked, they can do serious harm.
Do any of these sound familiar?
1. I have to be perfect.
Even if perfection were achievable, it’s not a healthy goal; as we discussed here not long ago, perfectionism can hold you back. Remember that mistakes are part of being human–and sometimes they’re our most valuable teachers.
2. My life is harder than anyone else’s.
Everyone faces difficulty and crisis. It is in dealing with every challenge, problem, and difficulty that we are able to learn and grow.
3. If I ignore it, it will go away.
Procrastination, magical thinking, and rescue fantasies may help us avoid hard truths for a while. But reality always catches up, and the longer you wait the worse it becomes.
4. I’m too young, or I’m too old.
I recently wrote about accomplishing great things at any age. At 5, Mozart was already competent on keyboard and violin, and at 76, Nelson Mandela became president of South Africa. The truth is you are never too young or too old.
5. I’m just not the happy type.
There will always be difficulties, but we determine how we handle them. Remember, happiness is not something we are; it is something we become through our choices.
6. I don’t judge people.
We all judge people. Researchers say we arrive at our first conclusion in less than a second. In some cases, it’s ourselves whom we’re judging, seeing how we measure up and fit in.
7. If I follow my heart, everything will work out.
Following your heart is good, but it should never override intellect and intuition. Aim for balance.
8. I don’t have a choice.
We always have a choice. It’s easy to blame others, or fate, for our outcomes, but accepting responsibility for yourself and your actions is an essential part of your humanity.
9. My worth is determined by my work.
No single facet of your life determines your worth. It’s spoken in every action and word you undertake. It’s who you are.
At worst, lying to ourselves can destroy us. At best, it can make life more difficult.
Let’s really think about it.
What lies do you tell yourself or see others telling themselves?
How can you counteract them?
N A T I O N A L B E S T S E L L E R
THE LEADERSHIP GAP
What Gets Between You and Your Greatness
After decades of coaching powerful executives around the world, Lolly Daskal has observed that leaders rise to their positions relying on a specific set of values and traits. But in time, every executive reaches a point when their performance suffers and failure persists. Very few understand why or how to prevent it.
Additional Reading you might enjoy:
- 12 Successful Leadership Principles That Never Grow Old
- A Leadership Manifesto: A Guide To Greatness
- How to Succeed as A New Leader
- 12 of The Most Common Lies Leaders Tell Themselves
- 4 Proven Reasons Why Intuitive Leaders Make Great Leaders
- The One Quality Every Leader Needs To Succeed
- The Deception Trap of Leadership
Photo Credit: Getty Images
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness has become a national bestseller.