Tag Archives: Listening.

21 Things New Leaders Should Do

Posted on 17. Jan, 2017 by .


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It’s easy to find lists of all the things that leaders shouldn’t do. Here are the positive steps you can take to build successful leadership.

Especially at the beginning of a leadership journey, it’s easy to focus on all the things you’re not supposed to do—don’t be inaccessible, don’t play favorites, don’t build your authority on fear. And those things are important, but if you focus exclusively on the don’ts you may have a hard time moving forward.

Here are 21 positive steps that will help you become the kind of the leader you can take great pride in, the kind people will honor with their followership.

1. Keep tabs on expectations. As a new leader you shouldn’t take for granted your new title or your role for granted. Just because you are the leader doesn’t mean you have to have it all figured out.

2. Grow your competencies and develop your skills. As a new leader studying every day is important, if you are doing just enough to get by, the day will come that it’s no longer good enough.

3. Listen to learn. Odds are that many—if not all—of the people on your team know more about various aspects of the business than you do. As a new leader respect the expertise of others.

4. Humility goes a long way. As a new leader humility is a skill that must acquired and practiced over and over again.

5. Be the missing link. As a new leader recognize that although your team may be very capable, you were placed in that job for a reason. You bring a perspective that the team may lack. Know what it is, and make sure they know what it is too.

6. Speak well of everyone. As a new leader, don’t badmouth upper management to your team or your team to upper management. It won’t score points with either side.

7. Protect and shield. As a new leader guard your people from unnecessary hassles from upstairs or outside, and from any unnecessary drama.

8. Ground yourself in trust. As a new leader make sure your people know that trust—giving it, earning it and building it together—is a top priority for the team.

9. Gain a sixth sense. As a new leader tune into your perceptions enough to be able to walk into a room and sense the morale of the occupants.

10. Know what is and isn’t important. As a new leader ignore trivial infractions and let them go unless they are linked to something bigger. Never ignore major violations.

11. Be the meditator, the coach, the mentor: As a new leader act promptly to squelch dissension, disputes, discord and disagreements.

12. Speak with candor. As a new leader avoid sarcasm, dishonesty, or gossip. Don’t let anything you say in the moment interfere with your reputation as someone who’s unfailingly candid, honest, and kind.

13. Strive to build a workplace in which respect is the centerpiece. As a new leader it requires that you and everyone on your team focus on both giving respect and earning it.

14. Make character matter. As a new leader make integrity and character the foundation of your leadership. Remember that you’re always leading by example.

15. Measure your actions. As a new leader evaluate everything you do to determine whether you’re having the effect you want to. If you don’t already know, learn how to use data to better understand your wins and misses.

16. Know what is urgent and what is not. As a new leader give a sense of urgency to tasks that are truly important. If you don’t convey it, how will they know?

17. Be willing to admit you don’t know. As a new leader just because you are the leader doesn’t mean you have all the answers. When you don’t know, say so—then make it a point to inquire, study and learn.

18. Treat everyone with courtesy. As a new leader treat people as you want to be treated.

19. Stay focused on mission. As a new leader keep your mission at the front of everything you do, no matter what distractions and outside influences enter the picture.

20. Have a low tolerance level for intolerance. As a new leader don’t EVER put up with bigots, bullies, bastards, weasels, snakes, swine, slimeballs or sleaze balls.

21. Lead by example. As a new leader this is where your leadership will ultimately be measured. So lead by example always.

Lead From Within: Before you are a leader success is all about growing yourself, when you become a leader success is all about growing others.

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7 Habits That Are Destroying Your Ability to Lead

Posted on 13. Dec, 2016 by .


screen-shot-2016-12-13-at-7-38-51-amWhether you are a manager, supervisor, entrepreneur or leader, it is your leadership abilities that will ultimately dictate your professional success or failure.

That means you need to identify which habits are working for you and which aren’t, and eliminate anything that may be keeping you from your goals.

Here are seven of the most destructive habits leaders can maintain:

1. Surrounding yourself with clones.  Strength lies in diversity and difference and challenge; being around people who are just like you may be comfortable, but it keeps you playing small.

2. Speaking without listening.  The best leaders listen more than they speak, and they know the importance of hearing and gathering information from all.

3.  Confusing activity with productivity. It’s easy to fall into the trap of keeping busy without actually being productive. There is always so much to do, but the tasks you naturally reach for are not necessarily the ones that should be at the top of your list of priorities. Instead of plowing through a to-do list, ask yourself what you should be doing to attain the results you want to see—to move you closer to your goals.

4. Flying solo. One of the biggest challenges for many people, especially leaders, is the belief in the power of one—the idea that you can do everything by yourself. Trying to do everything alone will end up exhausting and taxing you, and in time it will destroy your ability to lead.

5. Thinking you know it all. As a leader you need to always be willing to listen to others and be teachable. Sometimes people don’t want to have the answers handed to them but to brainstorm together and come up with a range of solutions. Other times people just want to vent.

6: Being unavailable and inaccessible. Being an unavailable and inaccessible leader, is the worst kind of leadership and management style, because it sends the message that your people are not important.

7. Constantly micromanaging. Saving the worst for last: Micromanagement is the flip side of leadership. The leader thinks no one can do the job as well as they can so they hover over you and make demands instead of allowing you to do your job. The message sent by micromanager leaders is “I don’t trust you.”

Lead From Within: Bad habits are destroying our leadership because they are hindering us from being the leader we want to be.


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The Gift That Keeps On Giving

Posted on 24. Dec, 2013 by .


Screen Shot 2013-12-23 at 3.56.30 PMWhen it comes to giving gifts, we all think about things we can purchase or make. But to give a gift whose value endures, give it from your heart.

 The best gifts are given from the heart.


A gift that is given from the heart, given to the right person at the right time and place, given with expectation of nothing in return, is a gift that will keep on giving.

In the language of the heart, giving translates as offering a part of yourself to someone who, at that moment, needs it more than you do.

So give from the heart to those who need to receive the most:

To those who feel betrayed, give the gift of loyalty.

To those who feel anxious, give the gift of tranquility.


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The Art Of Listening

Posted on 23. Oct, 2012 by .


We each have a need to be heard

The most basic human need is to understand and to be understood.
But most people do not listen; they listen with the goal of responding

To respond is to react, and to react is not to listen.

The art of listening is through silence.

Look at these word and mix them up. Listen. Silent. A perfect anagram.

The essence of listening is in silence:

  • Do not judge
  • Do not question
  • Do not fix

Be the silence that is needed when someone else speaks.

For many, being silent feels like being inactive. But listening is the act of paying attention, the act of consideration. The silence is not suppression; it’s where understanding begins.

So the next time you are prepared to speak, realize that you can listen and learn in silence.

The art of listening begins with:

Silence is the source of acknowledgement

Silence is the presence of appreciation.

Silence is the genesis of connecting one with another.

If you can stand the silence you will probably understand the spoken words.

Lead From Within: It is through silence that wisdom comes. The Art of Listening is what we get when we want to be heard.

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Sometimes You Have To Lose Yourself To Find Yourself

Posted on 28. Aug, 2012 by .


Sometimes you have to lose yourself to find yourself- Lolly Daskal
Imagine yourself wandering the streets of an unknown city in which you’ve just arrived. You’re tired from travel, losing daylight, and uncertain where you’re going to spend the night.

Feeling lost when you are alone can be disorienting and daunting.

Now imagine that same scenario, but add the stress of a group of people depending on you to tell them where to go.

Added to that, an organization is relying on you to make the budgets work and the financials sound.

Added to that, you are responsible for accountability for performance and external orientation.

Though it is rarely discussed, today many of our leaders feel overwhelmed, and in this overwhelming feeling is a deeper sense of being lost.

They have lost their sense of stability.

They have misplaced their sense of actionability.

They are searching for their sense of reliability.

Leaders today battle pressure that is high, hours that are long, and workplaces plagued by dysfunction. They are inundated with unending to-do lists and “must have” requests.

Many feel that they have fewer and fewer people to talk with and with whom they can connect. The higher they stand on the ladder in the organizational structure, the more isolated they are likely to feel.

As pressure mounts from the outside and expectations begin to crush our spirits, leaders must stop to reflect and reexamine their focus.

With so little security outside, we must search within our own minds and hearts. We must recognize and acknowledge our own feelings, our own emotions, and our own needs.

We must value our inclination to connect with others and contribute to ourselves.

We must remember why we are where and what our purpose is.

In doing so, we remind ourselves that the work we do matters and we call to mind that we matter.

As leaders, we don’t have to do this alone. We can reach out, we can reach in, and we can solve these issues together.

We will find when we have recovered our sense of meaning, we will have also reconnected with our purpose.

Lead From Within: As leaders we may sometimes feel lost, but it is in those moments that we can be found. Allow your instincts and emotions to inform your leadership. Stay open. Stay steady. Stay vulnerable. Stay strong.

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Truth Seekers

Posted on 11. Apr, 2011 by .


Most of us seek truth through our words but it is not the only way our lives speak, our lives speak through our actions and reactions, our intuitions and instincts, and our feelings. Perhaps these qualities are more profound than our words themselves.
People who are truth seekers are searching for their realities. They have a deep seated desire to know, to understand and reflect and feel what is accurate.
Many of us are in denial when our truth are revealed. We resist it. We become passive. We avoid it-but avoiding it doesn’t stop the truth from being true. […]

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