Are you one of those people who say YES to everyone and everything?
Maybe you suffer from what Psychologists call being a people-pleaser.
[quote]People Pleaser: n. A person who spends a lot of energy pleasing others. [/quote]
Abandoning our own rights often results in letting others mistreat us.
[quote] Some of us sacrifice self, because we want people to like us. [/quote]
How can you be liked without giving in to being a people-pleaser?
Be choosy. As leaders we always have a choice. People-pleasers often feel that they have to say yes when someone asks for their help. Remember that you always have a choice to say no. Ask yourself: Is this something I choose to do?
Be communicatiative. When you clearly communicate your priorities and values, people can better understand how their requests fit in—or how they don’t. Ask yourself: Am I letting those around me know what’s most important to me?
Be considerate. Be considerate of yourself and your time, and be considerate in your choices. Ask yourself: What are my options?
Be coherent. Be clear and consistent in stating your boundaries. When others overstep, let them know. Healthy boundaries go a long way in eliminating negativity and anger from your life. Ask yourself: Am I comfortable with where this request may take me?
Be confident. The attitude you bring to requests, whether you say yes or no, is an important part of how your response is perceived. Ask yourself: Why am I doing (or not doing) this? How does this response serve the bigger picture?
Most leaders are the kind of people you want to serve others, and true leadership is knowing that the greatest acts of kindness are those done by choice, not out of fear and guilt.
[quote] We are what we choose to be, so we must be careful about what choices we make.[/quote]
Lead From Within: Heart-based leaders are givers, but they do not sacrifice self. They know when to say yes to what is important, and when to say no so they can save themselves for the important things.
Of Lolly’s many awards and accolades, Lolly was designated a Top-50 Leadership and Management Expert by Inc. magazine. Huffington Post honored Lolly with the title of The Most Inspiring Woman in the World. Her writing has appeared in HBR, Inc.com, Fast Company (Ask The Expert), Huffington Post, and Psychology Today, and others. Her newest book, The Leadership Gap: What Gets Between You and Your Greatness is being released by Portfolio May 2017.