Lolly Daskal

Be The Real Deal

Posted on 07. Aug, 2011 by lollydaskal.

Life and leadership demands you be your authentic self. Try to LEAD like someone else. Try to BE like someone else and you will fail. You would just be a bad imitation of who you are imitating. People do not follow or engage with people who are not real.  
 
What does it take to be real, genuine and authentic? It takes sincerity, honesty, integrity, consistency and character.  
 
Why is authenticity so misunderstood? Many believe that authenticity is an intrinsic and instinctive quality. In fact authenticity is a quality that others must attribute and ascribe to you.  
 
No person, can look in the mirror and say to themselves; I am authentic!  
 
A person cannot be authentic on their own. Authenticity is largely defined by what other people see and say about you.  
 
So how can you embody being an authentic?

• make sure your words are consistent with your deeds
• embody your values and beliefs
• practice what you preach
• Be YOU.
• The real YOU.
• The Real DEAL.

 
 
Lead From Within: If you are a leader who is playing a role and pretending to be a leader -your followers, the people around you. will feel- see- hear- know the deception.

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Whereever You Go, Go With All Your Heart.

Posted on 31. Jul, 2011 by lollydaskal.

The total development of who you are and what you want and how you feel..... is essential to achieving your goals both in your personal and professional life. Once there used to be high morals and ethics in the workplace and the expectations of your personal life were private and non-inclusive.  
 
The truth is there is should be no difference between our inner personal work and those of our professional success - - our whole self is what we should bring to work and what we should bring home- if you want to be successful in the long run the best practice is the simplest truth: wherever you go, go with all your heart.  
 
If you bring your whole self to work and you lead from your heart you will be more likely to be the person who cares more, shares more, understands more, says more,  feels more, hears more and is liked more.  
 
Bringing your whole heart and continuously developing your personal mastery is just as important as leadership growth and leadership growth is just as important as organizational growth- all of it matters--all of it is interrelated.  
 
Sheryl Sandberg the Chief Operating Officer of Facebook says. "I believe in bringing your whole self to work. We are who we are. When you try to have this division between your personal self and professional self, what you really are is stiff... That doesn't mean people have to tell me everything about their personal lives. But I'm pretty sharing of mine." (New Yorker July 11 2011)  
 
The person who leads from the heart, and who brings their whole self to work,  is more likely to feel more comfortable with responsibilities, is more likely be more authentic and transparent.  
 
Lead From Within: Are you bringing your whole heart and self to your professional and personal life?  Are you standing with unconditional commitment and unequivocal courage to your truest self?  
 
To lead from within is know the simplest most profound truth: If you bring your heart, you bring your best self.

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An Educated Heart

Posted on 20. May, 2011 by lollydaskal.

Do you give? Do you give only because you want to receive?  
 
Do you think giving is easy?  
 
Giving is as much of an art as a portrait is to painting and the best contributions come from an “educated heart.”  
 
An educated heart learns what another person is needing or wanting, and then gives it to them with love.  
 
An educated heart knows that it takes a dedicated team around you to make you a success.  
 
An educated heart knows that life is hard and that people around you matter.  
 
An educated heart experiences peace and provides peace for another.  
 
An educated heart thinks of others before they think of themselves.  
 
An educated heart experiences fear but does it anyway.  
 
An educated heart gives not expecting anything in return.  
 
An educated heart knows you get the best when you give the best of yourself.  
 
An educated heart sees, hears and breathes kindness.  
 
An educated heart is filled with love.  
 
The value of a man resides in what he gives and not in what he is capable of receiving.” Albert Einstein  
 
With an educated heart you will give, acknowledge, appreciate and be kind to others. It will be your gift--- it will be you honor, privilege and opportunity. It will give you a chance to give something back by becoming more.  
 
Lead From Within: An educated heart does kindness with style. Who will you acknowledge today?

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Own Your Desires

Posted on 12. May, 2011 by lollydaskal.

So many of us deny our desires, but do you know our desires are an important aspect of what lies within us.  
 
Acknowledging our desires means discovering our inner self and accepting the core of our motivations.  
 
When we deny our desires, and when we attach rules, words or codes to our lives, we cut ourselves off from our gifts, love, and creativity.  
 
Each one of us has different wants and desires, wishes, dreams, hopes, visions, goals and plans.  
 
Are we telling people what we really want? Are we expressing our deepest wishes? Are we feeling the depth of our longing?  
 
For businesses to thrive and for relationships to succeed, we need to express our likes and dislikes and be open to giving and receiving.  We need to know that a big part of being successful and authentic means owning our desires.  
 
If we don’t own our desires, our self-assurance is deprived and our knowledge is limited. Those who do not define themselves remain lost in the crowd.  
 
Owning our desires provides us with a stronger sense of where we stand with ourselves and others.  When people understand what we want, they will be more clear about who we are.  
 
In Kabbalah it is explained that a desire is placed within us so that we can develop and reflect deeper. It is addressing the depth of the reality which appears inside of our heart - This is a "point in the heart." This point is a part of the greater reality which includes spirituality, emotionality and humanity.  
 
Your desire is about examining, engaging and exploring the deepest parts within you. Once you own your desire, your success will take hold and transform everything.  
 
Lead From Within: Follow the ways of your heart and OWN your desires. It will get you one step closer to realizing your hopes, dreams and goals.

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Do Not Give Up Before Your Time

Posted on 25. Apr, 2011 by lollydaskal.

A man had a fig tree planted in his vineyard and he went to look to see if there was any fruit. He couldn't find any and he became extremely frustrated. He went to find his gardener and  when he did - he said, "For the past three years I have been coming to look for fruit on this fig tree and I have not found any and I want you to cut it down right now."  
 
The gardener replied, "Sir, leave it alone for one more year and I will dig around it and fertilize it. If it bears fruit next year, that will be great. If it does not, then we will cut it down.  
 
How many times in our lives do we sound like the man in the garden?  
 
How many times have we looked at ourselves with harsh judgment and have been frustrated by all the hard work we have put into our lives and business?  
 
We expect our lives to cultivate without errors and without blunders. And when we fail, we are devastated and we want to cut it out-cut it down and walk away.  
 
We all want growth just like the tree owner and when we don't see the fruits of labor we judge ourselves and we do so without compassion and without kindness.  
 
I am here to say. Give yourself a break.  
 
Do not cut down your trees. Stop and see what is your truth.  
 
Do not walk away feeling like a failure. Stop and think why have you failed.  
 
Do not feel frustrated. Stop and think what is the problem? Does it need more sun? Does it need more water? Does it need more time? Is it planted in a place that cannot support it?  
 
Do not give up on your tree. Think how else can you nurture it and reflect what is your truth and how you can move toward grace.  
 
Dig deep into your weeds and keep your soil (soul) watered and fertilized do not let your judgments and harsh treatment of yourself soil (clutter) your mind.  
 
Lead From Within: Give yourself time to be the person you are meant to be do not cut yourself down before your time.  
 
The fig story was sent to me by my amazing client Sydney Rothenthal which inspired this blog post.  
 
 

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Focus On YOU Instead Of Them

Posted on 12. Apr, 2011 by lollydaskal.

 
 
Are you worried about the competition?  
 
Are you worried about your status?  
 
Are you forever looking over your shoulder?  
 
This kind of "looking over your shoulder" mindset leads to stress, stuckness, and sickness.  
 
Stop.  
 
Because worrying about "them”  and what they are doing and being anxious about what “them” are thinking, will detour you from what is happening with  YOU right now.  
 
Where are YOU at the moment?  
 
What are you thinking?  
 
What is your next step?  
 
How will YOU get there?  
 
These are courageous questions to occupy your mind. Rather then worrying and competing with everyone and everything around you.  
 
Your competition, is always going to be changing and forever evolving.  It will always be someone who is doing something better, more creative, more innovative than you. How will you keep up?  
 
You can't... it’s a never ending battle.  
 
My best advise is to Focus on YOU.  
 
What is going on right now with you is more important then what is going on with  “them”  
 
If you focus on “them” you will become a reactionary instead of visionary.  
 
If you focus on  “them” you will become stuck instead of focused.  
 
If you focus on “them" you will become confused instead of clear.  
 
If you are going to be somewhere be yourself. If you are going to be everywhere you will lose yourself. If you are going to someone be the best you can be.  
 
Lead From Within: What will you today in your business- in your relationships knowing that you are the best and rarest form of beauty on this earth.

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Stop Being Busy

Posted on 02. Apr, 2011 by lollydaskal.

Being busy does not mean you are being productive.  You could be wasting your time and talent focusing on "low return" tasks that rob you of your time without accomplishing anything meaningful.  
 
How many times have you said "I am so busy," but you found yourself not really accomplishing anything.  
 
Take a step back from all of your "busyness" to discover and explore what your gifts are.  
 
Know that you have limited strengths, and strive to excel where you are gifted.  
 
Don't allow your time to be taken up in areas where you're weaker, because then you're not at your best.  
 
Don't confuse activity with accomplishment.  Be busy with what you are good at and delegate the rest.  
 
As you narrow your focus, you will broaden the opportunities to shine with your strengths.  
 
Learn how to manage your actions and carefully choose how to spend your time.  
 
Identify time-wasters and implement solutions to eliminate them.  
 
Stop saying "I am so busy," and start knowing you are so productive.  
 
Lead From Within: Narrow your focus to increase your productivity.  
 
Stop being busy and join us for heartfelt and courage conversation every Tuesday 8pm est at our #leadfromwithin tweetchat

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You Are What You Hate

Posted on 08. Mar, 2011 by lollydaskal.

I hate to say this, but you are what you hate. Whether or not you’re going to hate is not the question. Hate is simply part of our human nature. But hate can be just as useful as love. Hate can change, motivate and clarify.  Used as an agent of change, hate can actually improve your business and your life. Perhaps you “hated” your job, and that lead you to become an entrepreneur.  Maybe you “hate” to see people suffer, and that inspired you to volunteer or make a difference. What you hate says a lot about who you are and what you value. What you hate gives meaning to what you care about. How you hate can determine how you may succeed in life and business. To say you hate is about stating what you will not tolerate; what you will not endure or accommodate. To hate something gives you focus.  It makes you strong and it protects you. To hate brings about motivation and clarity to solve problems that are not acceptable to you. To hate something negative might make you more passionate about changing or improving it. To hate is to stand up for your values and beliefs. To hate is to recognize your emotions when they are telling you that you must stand up for what you believe. To hate something can provide just as much perspective as love does. We all hate, but how we use the emotion can be productive or destructive. You must use hate the right way or you can hurt someone. You must use hate in a way that solves, protects, and brings value to what you stand for. The power of hatred can make your values and beliefs intentional.  It can inspire you to change the things you find unacceptable. To love is to invest in, to move forward, to give, to inspire, and to empower. To hate is to reject, to fear, to stray, to abandon, or to resist. Either emotion can tell you a lot about yourself. Lead from Within: To hate something is to choose to respond to it in a constructive way. Hate can be an ingredient in a balanced life.  The right combination of love, truth, hate and respect will get you to a place of balance, harmony and peace.

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Pay Attention Leaders!

Posted on 03. Mar, 2011 by lollydaskal.

Lets be honest. All of us are leaders. We are all busy. We have meetings, presentations, deadlines, speaking commitments, responsibilities and the list goes on and on. Paying attention in the midst of all this activity is extremely difficult. There are so many distractions. Great leaders practice paying attention. They listen with their heart and eyes and not with their brains and ears. When you are paying attention… When you are really curious… When you look for the best… When you put others first… When you linger… When you act interested… When you are open to others… Then you will find what you are seeking. How well are you doing in your leading? Are you truly paying attention? Our obligation as leaders is to pay attention. Here is a simple exercise about learning to pay attention: Pay attention to your breathing. Play close attention to your intake and out take of breathe. Pay attention to your listening. Close your eyes and listen. What do you hear? Really listen to everything. Pay attention to your feelings. Close your eyes. Put your hand on your heart. What feelings come up for you? Pay attention to your sense of smell. Close your eyes become aware of the odors. What do you smell around you? Pay attention to your sight. Open your eyes and notice what comes first in the line of your vision. See the colors, the lights, the textures… Slowly turn your head to the right and then to the left, and then look up and down. Pay attention to everything you see. Your ability to pay attention to the most common and immediate elements of your daily life helps you be more attuned to what is going on around you and with others. Lead From Within: You are the sum of all that you pay attention to.

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